Enjoy this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4HoquUdlSfo&NR=1
Off for a while and sorry for that. Had a bit of vacation time and enjoyed it!
Past few weeks back have been a blur. The LAPD, specifically our sworn employees union, is negotiating with the city for a new contract. I don't doubt they are doing the best they can. And in a city this big, with this kind of economy, well...everyone is feeling the pinch.
There is no overtime. Expect to hand over your arrestee and evidence at EOW (End of Watch) to the next unit so you can prevent overtime. We are REALLY managing our time effectively now. In all fairness, this should be the norm, but it isn't. I am all for hiring 10,000 more officers over the next five years if we can. Build more police and fire stations right next to each other.
I feel for the guys who bought too expensive a house, too many cycles, one more trophy handgun. I told an old partner of mine that you know when it's bad, when you come to work and look at the employee billboard filled with SeaDoos and boats for sale. Coppers hate giving up their toys more than a 5-year old!
Back to the lecture at hand. When will these states and cities wake up and spend MORE on schools, police and fire instead of spending less. The more educated our populace, the greater benefit to society as a whole. Here in the Peoples Republic of California, we continue to fund and build prisons and jails at an alarming rate. Meanwhile, the amortized burden of that is borne upon the backs of our kids in the UC college system, with 10% or more in tuition hikes that they will be trying to reconcile for the next 15 years.
Good job.
I'm no socialist, but the more people that go to college the less IDIOTS out on the street.
On a lighter note, I want to minimize LA's crime burden by issuing a Cease and Desist order to HUD for all future Section 8 housing applications. Go the F*&% away. LA doesn't want you. And if you can't get off Section 8 in the next 5 years, guess what? You're cut off. And if you can't afford to live here - MOVE. Let market forces decide who lives here and who doesn't. Let market forces decide if we need to put in better public transit to get people here.
In the area I work, there is a master-planned community with apartments, condominiums, townhouses, etc. Beautiful shops, parks, close the everything. But guess what? A bunch of people living there are Section 8, and some of them are the same miserable, no account F*&%s that I dealt with in other areas of the city. And now the car burglaries and residential burgs are up! Well, when you don't have a job, the government is paying for your apartment, SSI is paying for your "bad back" and you have all day to case houses....hmmmmmm?
But, all that said, everyone knows how thankful I am to have a job. I say it every day. I tell everyone, and give thanks to the Lord above for being a sworn Los Angeles Police Officer. I will NOT get furloughed. I will NOT be fired. I will NOT be downsized. I will NOT be early-retired. I will NOT be promoted anytime soon either, but hey, I have the best job in the world right now.
I work the streets.
And as an old training officer once said, "You gonna work the streets or let the streets work you? You gonna be out there making moves, making lives better for people or you gonna let the whole thing wash over you like a wave? You work the STREETS. You work the JOB! Never let the job work you."
Thank you brave citizens of Los Angeles. You often surprise me, sometimes you have let me down, but you never bore me. And quite a few of you lift me up on a daily basis. The waves and thanks are always appreciated.
Watch your six.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Fakin' The Funk or Get Outta Jail By Playing Sick
A few months ago (try early August 2009) I get a call of a vandalism / trespass suspect at a local hotel on Century Blvd. It is still early in the day, around 1100 hours, so we head over to try and handle the call quickly and move on. I figure it is probably some panhandler or some guest at the hotel who broke something.
Well, wrong, wrong, and wrong again. When we get there, turns out the guy is in custody in the security office. Apparently, he is a FREQUENT panhandler at the location. So much so that they have photographed him and ordered him to stay away. But, sensible guy that he is, do you think he listened? NO! I mean, this is a down economy! A guy has to work hard for the money, right?
This goofball, he's sitting on the floor, complaining that the handcuffs are one too tight and everything else. So we switch cuffs and run him for warrants. Surprise, surprise, surprise, as Gomer Pyle used to say, he's wanted for a bunch of stuff. Time for this hobo to go-go. He's no kid, been arrested before, he knows the dance. But that doesn't keep him from begging the whole way to the police station about letting him get a break, and letting him go and on and on and on and "Dude, be quiet. You sound like one of my kids. Stop whining and act like a man! Go to jail, clear your warrants, you'll be out in a few. You got more time than money."
We get him to the station, get the paperwork ready to book, everything is signed...suddenly it's Academy Award time. I mean, this guy fakes the funk with the best of them. Chest pains, arm pains, my head hurts, I need a doctor....all bull. But this is LAPD! We call this guy an ambulance and LA Fire Dept has to transport Defendant Dumbass to a contract hospital to clear him for booking.
Did I mention that my "rookie" partner used to be Los Angeles County Sheriff's Jailer? We did everything we could to keep from laughing at this guy at the hospital. His act was about as transparent as the wrap you put over the leftovers. He refused tests (because they would obviously show he was full of it...full of $@#*) and even began to talk slower and rasp his voice. At one point I think we even clapped for his performance. He was fake-dying with the best of them. And yet, we treated him courteously, the doctors treated him courteously and professionally- even though he was an idiot. But whenever the doctors left, he told my partner and I in a perfectly pain-free, unstressed, totally coherent voice, "Fuck you guys, I ain't going to no fuckin' jail and you can't make me." This went on for awhile. And then he said he wanted to make a complaint about the service.
I had enough. I called a supervisor, because that's what we do. Thank you Consent Decree. The supervisor, an experienced and respected field veteran of over 20 years, came to my aid and I filled said expert in on the details. We all went in, left the door open, the suspect said (on tape) that he had no complaint against any of us, that we had been fair to him, but he didn't want to go to jail. Then, in the interest of gathering information about any possible misconduct by officers, the supervisor made my partner and I leave the room.
The door closed.
A minute elapsed.
The door opened.
The supervisor had a smile.
"Everything's OK guys! He'll go to jail, no more problems."
The supervisor patted us on the back. "Good job today."
The supervisor left the hospital.
The arrestee was suddenly healed, friendly and happy.
We transported him to 77th Jail for booking without further incident.
Don't let anyone tell you that experience doesn't count. They don't have the experience and they don't count.
We get him to the station, get the paperwork ready to book, everything is signed...suddenly it's Academy Award time. I mean, this guy fakes the funk with the best of them. Chest pains, arm pains, my head hurts, I need a doctor....all bull. But this is LAPD! We call this guy an ambulance and LA Fire Dept has to transport Defendant Dumbass to a contract hospital to clear him for booking.
Did I mention that my "rookie" partner used to be Los Angeles County Sheriff's Jailer? We did everything we could to keep from laughing at this guy at the hospital. His act was about as transparent as the wrap you put over the leftovers. He refused tests (because they would obviously show he was full of it...full of $@#*) and even began to talk slower and rasp his voice. At one point I think we even clapped for his performance. He was fake-dying with the best of them. And yet, we treated him courteously, the doctors treated him courteously and professionally- even though he was an idiot. But whenever the doctors left, he told my partner and I in a perfectly pain-free, unstressed, totally coherent voice, "Fuck you guys, I ain't going to no fuckin' jail and you can't make me." This went on for awhile. And then he said he wanted to make a complaint about the service.
I had enough. I called a supervisor, because that's what we do. Thank you Consent Decree. The supervisor, an experienced and respected field veteran of over 20 years, came to my aid and I filled said expert in on the details. We all went in, left the door open, the suspect said (on tape) that he had no complaint against any of us, that we had been fair to him, but he didn't want to go to jail. Then, in the interest of gathering information about any possible misconduct by officers, the supervisor made my partner and I leave the room.
The door closed.
A minute elapsed.
The door opened.
The supervisor had a smile.
"Everything's OK guys! He'll go to jail, no more problems."
The supervisor patted us on the back. "Good job today."
The supervisor left the hospital.
The arrestee was suddenly healed, friendly and happy.
We transported him to 77th Jail for booking without further incident.
Don't let anyone tell you that experience doesn't count. They don't have the experience and they don't count.
Support Your Local Gunfighter!
This is a response I wrote to all the nonsense comments posted regarding this article:
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2009618456_webdeputyshooting07m.html
Before everyone jumps to conclusions, let us look at a few things. This story has few details, probably alot more than the deputy on duty got before this ended in a shooting. A great headline that really grabs you sells papers but doesn't tell the story. We need to offer Kidlit (another commenter) our condolences because that was apparently his family member that died.
As an officer, I find all the posts interesting. Read my past comments by clicking on my screen name and you will see that I try to be fair but I am biased FOR police officers. That said, the investigation has just begun and may take months to complete. Do officers get exonerated in a righteous shoot? Sure, to some degree, but you still have to live with yourself. Might you go to federal prison as an officer if you murdered someone needlessly? Yes, that can happen too.
For someone to comment that "people who choose to serve our community usually get into the gig not because it was a passion, but because they didnt know what they wanted to do with themselves" is a grossly reckless and irresponsible characterization of a vast group of public servants who are safeguarding so many people on a daily basis. And yeah, you're welcome!
Your training, department policy and experience dictates how you react in the middle of the night on a dark road with a potentially life-threatening scenario. So many people choose to jump to the conclusion that the deputy was some jack-booted thug out trampling all over people's rights so he can be a big man. Most likely, he is a guy with a few years on who wanted to go home at the end of his shift like everyone else.
For those of you who PERPETUALLY JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS, as I have seen in here so frequently, let me give you some anecdotal evidence. As a Los Angeles Police Officer I have seen more domestic violence calls, more burglaries, more robberies and WAY more 5150 (man/woman with mental illness)callouts in the past 6 months than I have seen in a long time. Some people are fearful, they are struggling and they are hurting. Until we get a toxicology report, we won't know what the deceased had in his bloodstream, if anything. We won't know the tactics and chain of events of this situation until the shooting team is done with their investigation.
Please people, reserve judgement until a later date. It is not the hate-filled world some of you believe, neither is it all sweetness and light. I tell my trainees that the most important thing we do everyday is when we have to take away someone's freedom. We have a Bill of Rights! You cannot take that lightly! But sometimes you are confronted by situations that do not allow for less-than-lethal force. Sometimes you can't talk to people anymore. Sometimes you have to explode with violence so you can go home to your kids and wife. And when the suspect or mentally ill person submits and you can handcuff them and secure them...you stop and do the right thing. Take them to jail or have them mentally evaluated.
There are plenty of great headlines about police shootings and people dying at the hands of police. They always say "The officer shot him" and they always say "the suspect ALLEGEDLY" did something to get shot. Even in such a statement, you see that the SUSPECT gets the benefit of the doubt but not the officer. It is like the media says" We for sure know this cop killed someone, but we doubt the suspect did something to deserve it."
Officer involved shooting stories lead the news...but not the stories of all the confrontations that ended peacefully or without incident. I worked 60 hours in 4 short days of typical duty a week ago. I handled reports, arrests, arrestee transfers, building searches, a home invasion investigation, callouts for mentally ill persons and a number of other crazy radio calls. But no one died and I had no use of force reports. The past three days I located a missing senior citizen that was kidnapped by a relative, sat in a hospital with an arrestee who was faking a back injury and no one died. My colleagues did similar work, outstanding work in this city of over 3 million. But the headlines read, "Officer shoots some poor guy who didn't deserve it."
What they don't say is that THOUSANDS of officers have died in the line of duty. On traffic stops, on suspicious person calls, on man down calls, on DUI investigations, and YES SOMETIMES TRYING TO SAVE SOMEONE'S LIFE. Just take a look: http://www.nleomf.com/TheMemorial/facts.htm
The facts on this shooting are not all in yet, people. Remember that.
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2009618456_webdeputyshooting07m.html
Before everyone jumps to conclusions, let us look at a few things. This story has few details, probably alot more than the deputy on duty got before this ended in a shooting. A great headline that really grabs you sells papers but doesn't tell the story. We need to offer Kidlit (another commenter) our condolences because that was apparently his family member that died.
As an officer, I find all the posts interesting. Read my past comments by clicking on my screen name and you will see that I try to be fair but I am biased FOR police officers. That said, the investigation has just begun and may take months to complete. Do officers get exonerated in a righteous shoot? Sure, to some degree, but you still have to live with yourself. Might you go to federal prison as an officer if you murdered someone needlessly? Yes, that can happen too.
For someone to comment that "people who choose to serve our community usually get into the gig not because it was a passion, but because they didnt know what they wanted to do with themselves" is a grossly reckless and irresponsible characterization of a vast group of public servants who are safeguarding so many people on a daily basis. And yeah, you're welcome!
Your training, department policy and experience dictates how you react in the middle of the night on a dark road with a potentially life-threatening scenario. So many people choose to jump to the conclusion that the deputy was some jack-booted thug out trampling all over people's rights so he can be a big man. Most likely, he is a guy with a few years on who wanted to go home at the end of his shift like everyone else.
For those of you who PERPETUALLY JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS, as I have seen in here so frequently, let me give you some anecdotal evidence. As a Los Angeles Police Officer I have seen more domestic violence calls, more burglaries, more robberies and WAY more 5150 (man/woman with mental illness)callouts in the past 6 months than I have seen in a long time. Some people are fearful, they are struggling and they are hurting. Until we get a toxicology report, we won't know what the deceased had in his bloodstream, if anything. We won't know the tactics and chain of events of this situation until the shooting team is done with their investigation.
Please people, reserve judgement until a later date. It is not the hate-filled world some of you believe, neither is it all sweetness and light. I tell my trainees that the most important thing we do everyday is when we have to take away someone's freedom. We have a Bill of Rights! You cannot take that lightly! But sometimes you are confronted by situations that do not allow for less-than-lethal force. Sometimes you can't talk to people anymore. Sometimes you have to explode with violence so you can go home to your kids and wife. And when the suspect or mentally ill person submits and you can handcuff them and secure them...you stop and do the right thing. Take them to jail or have them mentally evaluated.
There are plenty of great headlines about police shootings and people dying at the hands of police. They always say "The officer shot him" and they always say "the suspect ALLEGEDLY" did something to get shot. Even in such a statement, you see that the SUSPECT gets the benefit of the doubt but not the officer. It is like the media says" We for sure know this cop killed someone, but we doubt the suspect did something to deserve it."
Officer involved shooting stories lead the news...but not the stories of all the confrontations that ended peacefully or without incident. I worked 60 hours in 4 short days of typical duty a week ago. I handled reports, arrests, arrestee transfers, building searches, a home invasion investigation, callouts for mentally ill persons and a number of other crazy radio calls. But no one died and I had no use of force reports. The past three days I located a missing senior citizen that was kidnapped by a relative, sat in a hospital with an arrestee who was faking a back injury and no one died. My colleagues did similar work, outstanding work in this city of over 3 million. But the headlines read, "Officer shoots some poor guy who didn't deserve it."
What they don't say is that THOUSANDS of officers have died in the line of duty. On traffic stops, on suspicious person calls, on man down calls, on DUI investigations, and YES SOMETIMES TRYING TO SAVE SOMEONE'S LIFE. Just take a look: http://www.nleomf.com/TheMemorial/facts.htm
The facts on this shooting are not all in yet, people. Remember that.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Bye-bye Consent Decree!
For the past eight years, the Los Angeles Police Department has been under a federally-monitored and mandated Consent Decree. It has caused the implementation of WAY more activity at Parker Center. It has made line officers beholden to many more levels of review. And for the whole of my career, I have had to operate under the rules and oversight of the Consent Decree. You had to hear that word everyday. And you know what it's done for me?
Not a fucking thing.
If anything, the Consent Decree (same letters as Crushingly Draconian or Can't Deliver or Critically Damaged or Controlled Diplomacy) took a highly bureaucratic, paperwork-laden big-city police agency and made it . . . . much more highly bureaucratic and paperwork-laden. But now - NEW AND IMPROVED - with everyone looking over everyone else's shoulder like Caucescu's Romania.
I've been accused in more nonsensical bullshit complaints by two-bit gangsters trying to get me off the street than I ever would have been subjected to at Torrance or Manhattan or Newport Beach Police Department. And even though some of them were BULLSHIT on their face, it went to full investigation. Thanks Consent Decree!
I've been responsible for more penny-ante paperwork than I ever thought possible. The slogan on the door should read: "LAPD, We Do More With Less! But Not Less Paperwork!" That means less manpower, less public support and less, less, less officers in the street. Citizens, when it takes forever for an officer to show up, say "Thanks, Consent Decree!"
I have to do the job of the Jailer, the Property Clerk, the butcher, the baker and the friggin' candlestick maker because I spend about 6 hours of a 12 hour day just trying to outthink all these knuckleheads while I do what SHOULD BE their job. Hell, the jailers don't have to worry about the body until the last possible moment. I am responsible for these maggots from minutes 1 through 59 per hour. Then I'm off to label, list, account for, issue a receipt for and book evidence and property. Then I have to transport my sick arrestee all over the city for a medical service and on and on and on ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Thanks, Consent Decree!
And then, at roll call the next morning, the poor Lieutenant has to pass down the directive. We are all behind on traffic citations and the How can we save lives at these major intersections unless we write speeders and slow people down to prevent accidents? speech comes out. Even though he or she knows that we have so many pogues and slugs sitting downtown monitoring the consent decree that we could field a whole other division of officers. Thanks, Consent Decree!
The Consent Decree did help me buy a new house, what with all the overtime for paperwork and crap you have to fill out. I have a detective friend who used to joke that a robbery or homicide meant a new pair of shoes, because, Daddy, that callout to the scene is overtime! Of course, we are not really that cynical, but you have to stay motivated to do the excellent police work we do.
I think it will be a great time again here in La-La Land with no Consent Decree. Not everyone agrees with me, as this excerpt from Zach Behrens July 21, 2009 http://www.laist.com/ article shows:
“We’re disappointed by the judge’s decision. The department has made substantial progress under Chief Bratton, but there’s still too much evidence that skin color makes a difference in who is stopped, questioned and arrested by the LAPD,” said Mark Rosenbaum, legal director of the ACLU/SC. “We look to the Police Commission to work diligently to help keep the department focused on the goal of removing racial bias from its policing.” Last year the organization released a report titled "Racial Profiling & The LAPD: A Study of Racially Disparate Outcomes in the Los Angeles Police Department."
Chief William Bratton basically told them to go suck on an egg. “I resent their continuing intent to try to infer that this department engages in racial profiling,” Bratton said. “The ACLU needs to basically get off it and move on, because this city is moving on and we’re going to leave them behind.”
(See the article http://laist.com/2009/07/21/consent_degree_lifted_off_lapd_now.php :)
Well, the ACLU never did like us anyway, so they can cram it with walnuts.
See you on the streets, unless you see me first.
Not a fucking thing.
If anything, the Consent Decree (same letters as Crushingly Draconian or Can't Deliver or Critically Damaged or Controlled Diplomacy) took a highly bureaucratic, paperwork-laden big-city police agency and made it . . . . much more highly bureaucratic and paperwork-laden. But now - NEW AND IMPROVED - with everyone looking over everyone else's shoulder like Caucescu's Romania.
I've been accused in more nonsensical bullshit complaints by two-bit gangsters trying to get me off the street than I ever would have been subjected to at Torrance or Manhattan or Newport Beach Police Department. And even though some of them were BULLSHIT on their face, it went to full investigation. Thanks Consent Decree!
I've been responsible for more penny-ante paperwork than I ever thought possible. The slogan on the door should read: "LAPD, We Do More With Less! But Not Less Paperwork!" That means less manpower, less public support and less, less, less officers in the street. Citizens, when it takes forever for an officer to show up, say "Thanks, Consent Decree!"
I have to do the job of the Jailer, the Property Clerk, the butcher, the baker and the friggin' candlestick maker because I spend about 6 hours of a 12 hour day just trying to outthink all these knuckleheads while I do what SHOULD BE their job. Hell, the jailers don't have to worry about the body until the last possible moment. I am responsible for these maggots from minutes 1 through 59 per hour. Then I'm off to label, list, account for, issue a receipt for and book evidence and property. Then I have to transport my sick arrestee all over the city for a medical service and on and on and on ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Thanks, Consent Decree!
And then, at roll call the next morning, the poor Lieutenant has to pass down the directive. We are all behind on traffic citations and the How can we save lives at these major intersections unless we write speeders and slow people down to prevent accidents? speech comes out. Even though he or she knows that we have so many pogues and slugs sitting downtown monitoring the consent decree that we could field a whole other division of officers. Thanks, Consent Decree!
The Consent Decree did help me buy a new house, what with all the overtime for paperwork and crap you have to fill out. I have a detective friend who used to joke that a robbery or homicide meant a new pair of shoes, because, Daddy, that callout to the scene is overtime! Of course, we are not really that cynical, but you have to stay motivated to do the excellent police work we do.
I think it will be a great time again here in La-La Land with no Consent Decree. Not everyone agrees with me, as this excerpt from Zach Behrens July 21, 2009 http://www.laist.com/ article shows:
“We’re disappointed by the judge’s decision. The department has made substantial progress under Chief Bratton, but there’s still too much evidence that skin color makes a difference in who is stopped, questioned and arrested by the LAPD,” said Mark Rosenbaum, legal director of the ACLU/SC. “We look to the Police Commission to work diligently to help keep the department focused on the goal of removing racial bias from its policing.” Last year the organization released a report titled "Racial Profiling & The LAPD: A Study of Racially Disparate Outcomes in the Los Angeles Police Department."
Chief William Bratton basically told them to go suck on an egg. “I resent their continuing intent to try to infer that this department engages in racial profiling,” Bratton said. “The ACLU needs to basically get off it and move on, because this city is moving on and we’re going to leave them behind.”
(See the article http://laist.com/2009/07/21/consent_degree_lifted_off_lapd_now.php :)
Well, the ACLU never did like us anyway, so they can cram it with walnuts.
See you on the streets, unless you see me first.
Obama, Stay Out of This One.
OK, I'll admit it. I am a person of color, an African-American, a Black man. I don't know if that affords me a certain cache on this issue, or if it will make anyone take my opinion seriously. But there it is and it's out there.
RE: Cambridge, MA July 16, 2009 Arrest of Henry Louis Gates, Jr.
TO: President Barack Obama
Dear Mr. President,
We all know Mr. Gates, Jr. is your buddy, but please shut the hell up. I think it is high time to acknowledge you are better with a teleprompter than you are as an extemporaneous speaker. Don't feel bad, the last president had the same problem. But you are a LAWYER. You were a senator and a state legislator. You were elected to lead ALL the people of this great nation, not just minorities, not just people who agree with you, not just your buddies - EVERYONE.
Let me run it down for you in this fashion. Did you seriously think it was the best thing in the world to call police officers, even just a select few "stupid"? To say that "the Cambridge police acted stupidly in arresting somebody when there was already proof that they were in their own home" shows how little the public, even the president, know about police tactics and officer safety. Is he aware how many times officers receive a Burglary In Progress or Hot Prowl call, only to find the ex-husband or ex-wife lurking around the house. And of course their identification says they live there when they were just ordered out by a restraining order two months ago. It doesn't mean they aren't breaking the law. It doesn't mean we don't check the house for any other suspicious activity or possible intruders about which the homeowner is unaware. Our safety and that of the people we serve is paramount.
President Obama repeatedly said he did not know all the facts of the case during the course of the July 22, 2009 news conference. (Best Matlock-style Southern drawl here) Well, your Honor, I believe that dog don't hunt. The president has spoken out of school.
If you don't have anything nice to say, say NOTHING. Who wrote this speech for him, that ham-fisted Press Secretary Robert Gibbs? Hahaha. My goodness, Mr. President, you sure can pick 'em. You don't know the facts of the case, so guess what? I'll give you a free lesson. Your reply to questions on the issue could be, "Well, as you are probably all aware, Mr. Gates and I are old friends, good friends. I have spoken with him about the matter and offered him my support as a friend. I don't know what the outcome will be, but I know he is a decent, honorable and learned man, with the admiration of many students, scholars and friends. I also know that our police officers here and everywhere have a tough job to do. As citizens we need to offer them our support in their endeavors to keep the peace and help maintain the system of justice that gives us so much pride."
And leave it at that! When he opens up his mouth on this, he can't get some of those idiotic statements back. It's like herding cats; there is no way to organize this chaos.
Now, I know that race is a national and international issue. I LIVE WITH IT. I live with people looking at me, then looking at my kids, then doing a double-take. But there is much less of that than there was when I was a child. The world has changed and we have witnessed it. What we need to do is be honest about what we think, and yes, sometimes we have to watch what we say. But more than anything, we need to have an open dialogue about it. Do Blacks inherently have better rhythm? Are Asians and Indians somehow better engineers? Are Jewish people better with money? Or is it safe to say that we can all excel at whatever we put our minds, hearts and passions into, regardless of race, religion or ethnicity? Think about that, Mr. President.
RE: Cambridge, MA July 16, 2009 Arrest of Henry Louis Gates, Jr.
TO: President Barack Obama
Dear Mr. President,
We all know Mr. Gates, Jr. is your buddy, but please shut the hell up. I think it is high time to acknowledge you are better with a teleprompter than you are as an extemporaneous speaker. Don't feel bad, the last president had the same problem. But you are a LAWYER. You were a senator and a state legislator. You were elected to lead ALL the people of this great nation, not just minorities, not just people who agree with you, not just your buddies - EVERYONE.
Let me run it down for you in this fashion. Did you seriously think it was the best thing in the world to call police officers, even just a select few "stupid"? To say that "the Cambridge police acted stupidly in arresting somebody when there was already proof that they were in their own home" shows how little the public, even the president, know about police tactics and officer safety. Is he aware how many times officers receive a Burglary In Progress or Hot Prowl call, only to find the ex-husband or ex-wife lurking around the house. And of course their identification says they live there when they were just ordered out by a restraining order two months ago. It doesn't mean they aren't breaking the law. It doesn't mean we don't check the house for any other suspicious activity or possible intruders about which the homeowner is unaware. Our safety and that of the people we serve is paramount.
President Obama repeatedly said he did not know all the facts of the case during the course of the July 22, 2009 news conference. (Best Matlock-style Southern drawl here) Well, your Honor, I believe that dog don't hunt. The president has spoken out of school.
If you don't have anything nice to say, say NOTHING. Who wrote this speech for him, that ham-fisted Press Secretary Robert Gibbs? Hahaha. My goodness, Mr. President, you sure can pick 'em. You don't know the facts of the case, so guess what? I'll give you a free lesson. Your reply to questions on the issue could be, "Well, as you are probably all aware, Mr. Gates and I are old friends, good friends. I have spoken with him about the matter and offered him my support as a friend. I don't know what the outcome will be, but I know he is a decent, honorable and learned man, with the admiration of many students, scholars and friends. I also know that our police officers here and everywhere have a tough job to do. As citizens we need to offer them our support in their endeavors to keep the peace and help maintain the system of justice that gives us so much pride."
And leave it at that! When he opens up his mouth on this, he can't get some of those idiotic statements back. It's like herding cats; there is no way to organize this chaos.
Now, I know that race is a national and international issue. I LIVE WITH IT. I live with people looking at me, then looking at my kids, then doing a double-take. But there is much less of that than there was when I was a child. The world has changed and we have witnessed it. What we need to do is be honest about what we think, and yes, sometimes we have to watch what we say. But more than anything, we need to have an open dialogue about it. Do Blacks inherently have better rhythm? Are Asians and Indians somehow better engineers? Are Jewish people better with money? Or is it safe to say that we can all excel at whatever we put our minds, hearts and passions into, regardless of race, religion or ethnicity? Think about that, Mr. President.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
You Called Me A FA@@OT?
So we go to a radio call of a battery suspect in the projects. Or what passes for the projects in this area, Mar Vista Gardens. Long story short, we meet with a female black who tells us her friend (SEE girlfriend) and her got into an argument. The victim's shirt is torn, she's upset. And she tells us this suspect is on probation. We get all the information on the suspect, run her up on the computer and sure enough...she's got outstanding warrants. I proceed to call out a few more units and a supervisor. We formulate our plan, approach and order the suspect out. She is taken into custody without incident.
Now comes the good part. Everything is Code 4! Suspect is in custody, all the other officers can go back to their areas, we will take this "lady" to jail. My partner and I go back to the car and our suspect is detained in the back seat. I call my partner to the rear of the vehicle. As I am about to close the trunk, I say, "Well, we could violate her probation and all that, but why don't we just take her for the warrants! No reason to make it worse." My partner concurred. I closed the trunk.
I approach the rear passenger side of my vehicle. "Miss," I say, "Do you want to tell me what...
"FUCK YOU MOTHERFUCKER YOU FUCKING FAGGOT ASS PUNK FAGGOT BITCH! I HEARD YOU TALKING SHIT ABOUT ME BEHIND THE CAR YOU THINK I'M STUPID I CAN'T HEAR YOUR FAGGOT ASS TALKIN' ABOUT ME THROUGH THE TRUNK YOU WANT TO TAKE ME TO JAIL VIOLATE MY PROBATION FUCK YOU DO IT THEN YOU PUNK AS BITCH!
"Ma'am, I have barely said two words to you...why don't you try to calm down."
"DON'T FUCKIN' TALK TO ME YOU UNDERCOVER FAGGOT! I SEE THAT RING ON YOUR FINGER! YOUR WIFE KNOW YOU A UNDERCOVER FAG!?! THAT YOU TAKE IT UP YOUR ASS? STOP TRYING TO TALK TO ME YOU PUNK ASS FAGGOT! YOU LIKE PEOPLE TO PACK YOUR FUDGE! I'M A BITCH AND I GOT A BIGGER DICK THAN YOU! I'LL PACK YOUR SHIT NIGGA! YOU AIN'T SHIT, YOU COPS AIN'T SHIT YOU AND NOTHIN' BUT A UNDERCOVER FAGGOT YOU PUNK ASS BITCH!"
"Ma'am, you don't hear me yelling at you. Why don't you calm down for a minute and I could tell you what's going on with -"
She cuts me off, sweating like a pig, sitting in the back of my police car, yelling and ranting loud enough for the whole fucking world to hear it...
"FUCK YOU MOTHAFUCKA YOU-AIN'T-SHIT AND I'LL PACK YOUR SHIT YOU UNDACOVA FAGGOT ASS PUNK BITCH YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' BUT A BITCH DO ALL THE OTHER PUNK ASS COPS KNOW YOUSE A FAGGOT YOU BITCH. DOES YOUR MOMMA KNOW SHE GAVE BIRTH TO A BITCH YOU FAGGOT PUNK I'LL FUCK YOU UP! I'LL PACK YOUR FUDGE NIGGA YOU AIN'T SHIT!"
Now, allow me to pause here for a moment. I was trained by several OLD-timers. When I came on these guys already had 35 years and told me how it was, how it used to be, and don't put up with this shit. LAPD doesn't take shit from NOBODY. Standby for the ass-kicking lady! But they also understood that the reality now is, since RAMPART and since RODNEY-FUCKING-KING and since every other stupid thing that people are willing to believe, we have a Consent Decree and that means we have to think. We need to play it cool sometimes and be the police professionals we know ourselves to be.
But let's not kid ourselves....nothing would have been as much fun as to pull this idiot out of the car and get in some baton therapy. But I digress. I was, at that time, working with a probationary officer, a rookie. I have to set a good example so this person doesn't get herself fired someday.
So I told the lady, "Ma'am I am done talking to you."
But she went on and on for at least three more hours. All the way to the station, out of the car, into the station, sitting in the holding tank, back out to the car, all the way to Van Nuys Jail IN HEAVY TRAFFIC, all the way out of the car, into the Valley Jail, onto the bench outside the dispensary.
THREE HOURS OF THIS BITCH. I even recorded her on my cell phone. It was nuts. I really started to feel sorry for her because her life is FUCKED.
And after three hours of her trying to goad me into something stupid so she could hit the LAPD Use of Force lottery, I waited until about ten minutes before she got booked...
"Miss, you know why I haven't talked to you? Why I choose to ignore all the things you say?"
"CUZ, YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' BUT A FAGGOT BITCH. DO ALL THESE JAIL PEOPLE KNOW YOU A FAG?"
"Shhh. Be quiet. You're in my house now. Show some respect for these people, even if you don't like me."
"FUCK YOU FAGGOT."
"Ma'am, the reason I don't talk to you is because it is obvious to me and everyone here that you are MENTALLY ILL. You obviously hate yourself and you're crazy so you don't know what to do. I have no reason to waste my time on such and unreasonable person."
"FUCK YOU I AIN'T CRAZY, YOU THE CRAZY ONE YOU UNDACOVA FAG!"
"Shutup. You don't understand the forces at work against you. You see, for you THIS is it. This right here is the rest of your life....getting locked up and going to jail. You're what? Twenty-five right now? I imagine that you keep going like this you'll be lucky if they don't scrape you off the street at thirty years old. You can pop off to me all day, but do that in the street and it will get you capped (Euphemism for getting shot). Good luck with your life because this is just the beginning of how screwed up it will get..."
"FUCK YOU! I AIN'T CRAZY. YOU AIN'T SHIT AND YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' BUT A FAGGOT! FUCK YOU."
"Good luck to you. You're gonna need it."
And they say we don't earn our pay....hahaha. I love this job.
Now comes the good part. Everything is Code 4! Suspect is in custody, all the other officers can go back to their areas, we will take this "lady" to jail. My partner and I go back to the car and our suspect is detained in the back seat. I call my partner to the rear of the vehicle. As I am about to close the trunk, I say, "Well, we could violate her probation and all that, but why don't we just take her for the warrants! No reason to make it worse." My partner concurred. I closed the trunk.
I approach the rear passenger side of my vehicle. "Miss," I say, "Do you want to tell me what...
"FUCK YOU MOTHERFUCKER YOU FUCKING FAGGOT ASS PUNK FAGGOT BITCH! I HEARD YOU TALKING SHIT ABOUT ME BEHIND THE CAR YOU THINK I'M STUPID I CAN'T HEAR YOUR FAGGOT ASS TALKIN' ABOUT ME THROUGH THE TRUNK YOU WANT TO TAKE ME TO JAIL VIOLATE MY PROBATION FUCK YOU DO IT THEN YOU PUNK AS BITCH!
"Ma'am, I have barely said two words to you...why don't you try to calm down."
"DON'T FUCKIN' TALK TO ME YOU UNDERCOVER FAGGOT! I SEE THAT RING ON YOUR FINGER! YOUR WIFE KNOW YOU A UNDERCOVER FAG!?! THAT YOU TAKE IT UP YOUR ASS? STOP TRYING TO TALK TO ME YOU PUNK ASS FAGGOT! YOU LIKE PEOPLE TO PACK YOUR FUDGE! I'M A BITCH AND I GOT A BIGGER DICK THAN YOU! I'LL PACK YOUR SHIT NIGGA! YOU AIN'T SHIT, YOU COPS AIN'T SHIT YOU AND NOTHIN' BUT A UNDERCOVER FAGGOT YOU PUNK ASS BITCH!"
"Ma'am, you don't hear me yelling at you. Why don't you calm down for a minute and I could tell you what's going on with -"
She cuts me off, sweating like a pig, sitting in the back of my police car, yelling and ranting loud enough for the whole fucking world to hear it...
"FUCK YOU MOTHAFUCKA YOU-AIN'T-SHIT AND I'LL PACK YOUR SHIT YOU UNDACOVA FAGGOT ASS PUNK BITCH YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' BUT A BITCH DO ALL THE OTHER PUNK ASS COPS KNOW YOUSE A FAGGOT YOU BITCH. DOES YOUR MOMMA KNOW SHE GAVE BIRTH TO A BITCH YOU FAGGOT PUNK I'LL FUCK YOU UP! I'LL PACK YOUR FUDGE NIGGA YOU AIN'T SHIT!"
Now, allow me to pause here for a moment. I was trained by several OLD-timers. When I came on these guys already had 35 years and told me how it was, how it used to be, and don't put up with this shit. LAPD doesn't take shit from NOBODY. Standby for the ass-kicking lady! But they also understood that the reality now is, since RAMPART and since RODNEY-FUCKING-KING and since every other stupid thing that people are willing to believe, we have a Consent Decree and that means we have to think. We need to play it cool sometimes and be the police professionals we know ourselves to be.
But let's not kid ourselves....nothing would have been as much fun as to pull this idiot out of the car and get in some baton therapy. But I digress. I was, at that time, working with a probationary officer, a rookie. I have to set a good example so this person doesn't get herself fired someday.
So I told the lady, "Ma'am I am done talking to you."
But she went on and on for at least three more hours. All the way to the station, out of the car, into the station, sitting in the holding tank, back out to the car, all the way to Van Nuys Jail IN HEAVY TRAFFIC, all the way out of the car, into the Valley Jail, onto the bench outside the dispensary.
THREE HOURS OF THIS BITCH. I even recorded her on my cell phone. It was nuts. I really started to feel sorry for her because her life is FUCKED.
And after three hours of her trying to goad me into something stupid so she could hit the LAPD Use of Force lottery, I waited until about ten minutes before she got booked...
"Miss, you know why I haven't talked to you? Why I choose to ignore all the things you say?"
"CUZ, YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' BUT A FAGGOT BITCH. DO ALL THESE JAIL PEOPLE KNOW YOU A FAG?"
"Shhh. Be quiet. You're in my house now. Show some respect for these people, even if you don't like me."
"FUCK YOU FAGGOT."
"Ma'am, the reason I don't talk to you is because it is obvious to me and everyone here that you are MENTALLY ILL. You obviously hate yourself and you're crazy so you don't know what to do. I have no reason to waste my time on such and unreasonable person."
"FUCK YOU I AIN'T CRAZY, YOU THE CRAZY ONE YOU UNDACOVA FAG!"
"Shutup. You don't understand the forces at work against you. You see, for you THIS is it. This right here is the rest of your life....getting locked up and going to jail. You're what? Twenty-five right now? I imagine that you keep going like this you'll be lucky if they don't scrape you off the street at thirty years old. You can pop off to me all day, but do that in the street and it will get you capped (Euphemism for getting shot). Good luck with your life because this is just the beginning of how screwed up it will get..."
"FUCK YOU! I AIN'T CRAZY. YOU AIN'T SHIT AND YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' BUT A FAGGOT! FUCK YOU."
"Good luck to you. You're gonna need it."
And they say we don't earn our pay....hahaha. I love this job.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
The Wheelchair Rodeo
In homage to Seth and Amy from Saturday Night Live....this is a little segment I call:
REALLY?!? With Inside the Black and Whites.
Two days in a row my probationary officer and I had to transport stinky, filthy, dirty, smelly, disgusting transient (SEE homeless person OR f#$%ing bum) across the wide expanse of the City of Angels. Why? Because someone (not me) arrested them and we need to get them to jail/court/county lockup/jail dispensary. Oh and both times they were in wheelchairs.
REALLY?!?
What the f#$% are the jailers doing? We do have jailers, don't we? I mean, REALLY, the city would rather pay two officers making base pay between $65-100k a year to NOT patrol the streets but instead to be HOMELESS ARRESTEE TAXI SERVICE?
And REALLY!?! The car is black and white not YELLOW!
And REALLY!?! It took no less than 5 (YEAH F-I-V-E!) hours both times we did it. Almost half the day gone...
And REALLY!?! People wonder why it takes so long to get the LAPD to your house? Averaging four cars on a weekday, on day shift, to cover no less than 24 square miles and the best policy we can come up with is "Let the officer drive this jackass to jail."
And REALLY!?! Do you think there is anything I can teach a rookie on such a run other than, "Hey, it's the LAPD, we do more with less." or "Hey, don't feel bad, we've always been this fucking inefficient, and nobody cares. Enjoy it. We get paid the same whether we drink coffee or shoot at bad guys."
And REALLY!?! If you're a criminal in a wheelchair you should...wait. REALLY!?! You're in a friggin' wheelchair! Why are you even trying to commit crimes you dimwit?
And REALLY!?! You can always tell how important the officer's time is by how the department treats them. Look around at your police station. Really. If you don't see a paddywagon to transport these idiots criminals from the field to the jail, the department is wasting the officers time.
And REALLY!?! As funny and tragic as it sounds, you really have to admire my fellow officers for doing as much as we do under this kind of nonsensical, ridiculous system. The way Federal, State and local governments run their operations, they wouldn't survive a year in the private sector. And Los Angeles is about as corrupt as it gets.
REALLY! If you don't believe me, take a day off and go to a Los Angeles City Council Meeting. Goat Rodeo to the Nth degree and I am not kidding. Like herding cats. Be happy the whole damn city is not on fire or under water right now...
And REALLY!? We do appreciate it when people tell us thanks...even when we're in traffic or the middle of our lunch. We do this job for the people and it is fun. Dangerous but fun.
And REALLY!?! They pay me pretty well, so I can't always bitch, but it's funny :-)
REALLY?!? With Inside the Black and Whites.
Two days in a row my probationary officer and I had to transport stinky, filthy, dirty, smelly, disgusting transient (SEE homeless person OR f#$%ing bum) across the wide expanse of the City of Angels. Why? Because someone (not me) arrested them and we need to get them to jail/court/county lockup/jail dispensary. Oh and both times they were in wheelchairs.
REALLY?!?
What the f#$% are the jailers doing? We do have jailers, don't we? I mean, REALLY, the city would rather pay two officers making base pay between $65-100k a year to NOT patrol the streets but instead to be HOMELESS ARRESTEE TAXI SERVICE?
And REALLY!?! The car is black and white not YELLOW!
And REALLY!?! It took no less than 5 (YEAH F-I-V-E!) hours both times we did it. Almost half the day gone...
And REALLY!?! People wonder why it takes so long to get the LAPD to your house? Averaging four cars on a weekday, on day shift, to cover no less than 24 square miles and the best policy we can come up with is "Let the officer drive this jackass to jail."
And REALLY!?! Do you think there is anything I can teach a rookie on such a run other than, "Hey, it's the LAPD, we do more with less." or "Hey, don't feel bad, we've always been this fucking inefficient, and nobody cares. Enjoy it. We get paid the same whether we drink coffee or shoot at bad guys."
And REALLY!?! If you're a criminal in a wheelchair you should...wait. REALLY!?! You're in a friggin' wheelchair! Why are you even trying to commit crimes you dimwit?
And REALLY!?! You can always tell how important the officer's time is by how the department treats them. Look around at your police station. Really. If you don't see a paddywagon to transport these idiots criminals from the field to the jail, the department is wasting the officers time.
And REALLY!?! As funny and tragic as it sounds, you really have to admire my fellow officers for doing as much as we do under this kind of nonsensical, ridiculous system. The way Federal, State and local governments run their operations, they wouldn't survive a year in the private sector. And Los Angeles is about as corrupt as it gets.
REALLY! If you don't believe me, take a day off and go to a Los Angeles City Council Meeting. Goat Rodeo to the Nth degree and I am not kidding. Like herding cats. Be happy the whole damn city is not on fire or under water right now...
And REALLY!? We do appreciate it when people tell us thanks...even when we're in traffic or the middle of our lunch. We do this job for the people and it is fun. Dangerous but fun.
And REALLY!?! They pay me pretty well, so I can't always bitch, but it's funny :-)
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