Bye-bye Consent Decree!

For the past eight years, the Los Angeles Police Department has been under a federally-monitored and mandated Consent Decree. It has caused the implementation of WAY more activity at Parker Center. It has made line officers beholden to many more levels of review. And for the whole of my career, I have had to operate under the rules and oversight of the Consent Decree. You had to hear that word everyday. And you know what it's done for me?

Not a fucking thing.

If anything, the Consent Decree (same letters as Crushingly Draconian or Can't Deliver or Critically Damaged or Controlled Diplomacy) took a highly bureaucratic, paperwork-laden big-city police agency and made it . . . . much more highly bureaucratic and paperwork-laden. But now - NEW AND IMPROVED - with everyone looking over everyone else's shoulder like Caucescu's Romania.

I've been accused in more nonsensical bullshit complaints by two-bit gangsters trying to get me off the street than I ever would have been subjected to at Torrance or Manhattan or Newport Beach Police Department. And even though some of them were BULLSHIT on their face, it went to full investigation. Thanks Consent Decree!

I've been responsible for more penny-ante paperwork than I ever thought possible. The slogan on the door should read: "LAPD, We Do More With Less! But Not Less Paperwork!" That means less manpower, less public support and less, less, less officers in the street. Citizens, when it takes forever for an officer to show up, say "Thanks, Consent Decree!"

I have to do the job of the Jailer, the Property Clerk, the butcher, the baker and the friggin' candlestick maker because I spend about 6 hours of a 12 hour day just trying to outthink all these knuckleheads while I do what SHOULD BE their job. Hell, the jailers don't have to worry about the body until the last possible moment. I am responsible for these maggots from minutes 1 through 59 per hour. Then I'm off to label, list, account for, issue a receipt for and book evidence and property. Then I have to transport my sick arrestee all over the city for a medical service and on and on and on ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Thanks, Consent Decree!

And then, at roll call the next morning, the poor Lieutenant has to pass down the directive. We are all behind on traffic citations and the How can we save lives at these major intersections unless we write speeders and slow people down to prevent accidents? speech comes out. Even though he or she knows that we have so many pogues and slugs sitting downtown monitoring the consent decree that we could field a whole other division of officers. Thanks, Consent Decree!

The Consent Decree did help me buy a new house, what with all the overtime for paperwork and crap you have to fill out. I have a detective friend who used to joke that a robbery or homicide meant a new pair of shoes, because, Daddy, that callout to the scene is overtime! Of course, we are not really that cynical, but you have to stay motivated to do the excellent police work we do.

I think it will be a great time again here in La-La Land with no Consent Decree. Not everyone agrees with me, as this excerpt from Zach Behrens July 21, 2009 http://www.laist.com/ article shows:

“We’re disappointed by the judge’s decision. The department has made substantial progress under Chief Bratton, but there’s still too much evidence that skin color makes a difference in who is stopped, questioned and arrested by the LAPD,” said Mark Rosenbaum, legal director of the ACLU/SC. “We look to the Police Commission to work diligently to help keep the department focused on the goal of removing racial bias from its policing.” Last year the organization released a report titled "Racial Profiling & The LAPD: A Study of Racially Disparate Outcomes in the Los Angeles Police Department."

Chief William Bratton basically told them to go suck on an egg. “I resent their continuing intent to try to infer that this department engages in racial profiling,” Bratton said. “The ACLU needs to basically get off it and move on, because this city is moving on and we’re going to leave them behind.”

(See the article http://laist.com/2009/07/21/consent_degree_lifted_off_lapd_now.php :)

Well, the ACLU never did like us anyway, so they can cram it with walnuts.

See you on the streets, unless you see me first.