Schedules, Days Off and Other Monsters

Sorry I haven't posted in sooooo long, but it has been crazy!

Ever ask your wife what days off she wants you to have about 1 hour before submitting your schedule? Oh sure, you may have talked about Timmy's baseball game or Jenny's soccer game, or the doctor's appointment or whatever...but honey, what days do you want me to ask for?

Well guess what? It doesn't matter. Because no matter what you ask for, it will get royally F*&$ed up beyond any recognition by the time you get the approved schedule back. And it isn't your fault. And it isn't even the sergeant's fault. Sure you asked for the right days, but with Maximum and Heavy Deployment days, citizen protests, training days, court, Memorial Day, etc........good luck.

Don't know what a Max Deployment or Heavy Deployment day is? Well, let me tell you. This is a day that you can't get off because they need EVERYONE to work. Like July 4th. Or Memorial Day weekend...that's right, the whole damn weekend. Or 9/11. Or Cinco De Mayo. Or Labor Day...aaaah, Labor Day. Where I stood directing traffic in the hot sun for about 8 hours at Vista Del Mar and Imperial Highway as Joe Citizen, his wife, three kids, toy poodle and cooler full of snacks breezes up to my car at 3 in the afternoon and ask, "Are there any parking spots left at the beach?" Really? Really.

And god forbid this agency come into the 1990's and use software to make the schedule based on haves/needs/seniority/requests/etc. It's much more cost-effective to take a highly-trained field sergeant OUT OF THE FIELD for a day to work on the schedule for the guys on his shift. Let's see, (1 sergeant per watch) X ( 4 watches ) X (5 hrs. time wasted minimum) = 20 hours of lost sergeant time...and this kind of nonsense is just the tip of the iceberg in terms of time WASTED and LOST at LAPD.

But...somehow, things can still change. After years of frustration over schedules (mostly my wife's frustration), I can be pissed but I have to tow the line. I'm the senior training officer on the car. And balance your car? How? With four people? And one of them is a rookie tied to you because you need to train that guy and write his daily and weekly ratings? Of course we all want a weekend off. And to me, weekend means a FRI-SAT, SAT-SUN, SUN-MON or any combination thereof. This is the police department, not the offices of AIG.

But this is the best part. Doesn't matter whether you're a guy or girl, this applies. Rest assured, when the schedule is printed, signed, approved, and the sergeant did everything he or she could to help you out - someone in your house won't like it!

That's right. You'll get all the days they wanted you to get, but when you have 4-5 day stretch of days off, (what seems like a mini-vacation) your husband will be out of town on business. Or your girlfriend will be studying for finals. Or little Johnny has an out of state hockey tournament and you have to take the team. Or it's that time of the month - every day. Or your mother-in-law comes to visit. The dog needs a hip replacement. Little Susie's pet iguana dies. The house has to be tented for termites. The batmobile gets a flat tire. God has a funny way of testing our patience!

But in the end, you'll still get a few hours where the kids aren't around and you can sit in the garage watching old Adam-12 episodes on DVD, drinking a cold one on a Tuesday night. All you can do is laugh about it, and I'm happy to be employed. I feel like one of the lucky ones.

Be safe out there.